Part 24 ~(lettuce eat)

KAIN TAYO ( let's eat) or~ lettuce eat?

Here, everyone eats rice 3/7/365...it seems at least 3-4 times daily. And no, I'm not talking about a modest cup or scoop. These are Filipinos! They go all the way.
Gottzta Fill that plate or go home!

When eating out in fastfood restaurants, rice is usually served in a burger-like fashion. It's molded in a cup, so it looks like a bun, and often wrapped in sandwich paper. For heavy eaters, a cup is never enough. My son orders 2x's over what this Irishman can ever do, but he is after all 1/2 Filipino? It seems that even before we are finished with our breakfast or dinner, someone's already talking about what to prepare for the next meal????


Theres this bucket of rice which the server carries while walking around, trying to spot “unli-ricers.” People can go as much as 3 refills or even 4. Don't be fooled. The first cup that comes in your plate is smaller than the succeeding cups the bucket holder will give you. If you loosen the cupped rice, it will literally cover your whole plate. Good bye diet! What's worse is, they have bottles of soy sauce and chicken oil. Yessss. You pour them like soup over yer rice and gobble till you fatten up.

Okay, so since I'm talking about food, might as well mention this. Barkada is a Filipino term for a group of friends. When here I see the meal promos always targetted families. And because Filipino families they tend to be huge, you'll find chicken buckets in KFC. Here in the Philippines, the most bundles can accomodate are 6 people. But yeah, everything is for group of friends. Like barkada meal bundles, etc.

There's also McDonald's BFF Fries, which I find really cute.
Speaking of groups, it's pretty normal to order meals good for 3 or 4 people in a restaurant. Though single meals are also very common, it is always better to eat with company and share from the same set of food ya know???

*Jollibee
The chickenjoy (a trademark for their particular fried chicken) is like the best in the country. It's really reallly good!.
It's a normal thing to see 2 or more branches of Jollibee in one block or along the same street. It's everywhere.
What's up with the popularity of the fried chicken?
I'm not sure if it's because of Jollibee's success, but today, literally every fastfood place in the country has its own take on fried chicken. Even McDonald's, pizza shops, and bakeries sell chicken and rice. Strange to me because I always thought only Jollibee and KFC sold fried chicken. Don't even get me started on gravy. Everyone has their own gravy too. It's like they're just copying concepts.
As for me personally ~~~~ I came here for real authentic pure Filipino food!!!

Filipinos always invite other people to join them even if they were eating from a tiny lunchbox. This is something I never actually understood. I don't know if it's just

 something said out of politeness (e.g. you're eating and someone walks in the room) or legit generosity/hospitality. I was once invited by a person eating a burger. You can invite anyone, even random passersby.
The default response is usually “Sige,” which literally means okay, but people don't actually sit to join you in meal (unless they have the audacity to take the offer literally). So I guess in this sense, Sige means go ahead, as in “Go ahead. Just eat your food. Don't mind me.”

Part 23~Sewing the seeds

One of the things I really enjoy around here being in the land of smiles is enrolling people and engagement. Sometimes I would tell the cashier that they have the most beautiful smile on this island and they light up. You never know about the other persons circumstances if they're having a really rough day, if someone died or their car broke, someone else got in wreck, if their dog died,they're losing their job next week or their hearts broken whatever it may be~
Kindness is universal.
It is a language the blind can see and the deaf can hear.
❤️

So yesterday I went to immigration and when the cashier asked for the amount I obviously complained that it was unfair to charge me for my overstaying because it's the Philippines fault! Reason being; if it weren't so damn BEAUTIFUL HERE & THE FILIPINO'S WERE NOT SO DAMN FRIENDLY ~ I would surely have left after 30days???? This was not a complaint she was use to or ready for, but the guard in back understood and rode on the joke! BTW----- I was not charged for late fee?

Have you noticed there are armed security guards everywhere,every store, every door. There is a guard at the pharmacy in my area and when I get inside,I give greetings back. And if I see that smile......me being a joker upon exiting -I (pretend to shoplift ~while being quite obvious and always make sure to guard sees me?)
It brings a smile to his face as he knows it's a joke? Now when I went in to the same pharmacy today that I visited 3 weeks ago, I was walking out the door and he tried to offer to put things in my shirt and the girls behind the counter laughed! I didn't even recognize him from before- but he certainly seems to have remembered! Now - that's funny!

Perhaps it's because I worked with bands and music for a long time and I know that an audience doesn't want to see a performer just in there leaning up against the wall to play guitar? You want them to dance around and pull you in! This is our only life I know of yet,  while I'm not saying - be on stage for everyone, just open yourself to experiences?

What does it cost to acknowledge someone while walking? What does it cost to wave hello when they see a visitor (in my case, BLUE EYES)? What is the price for saying thank you? For me personally not doing small simple gestures is a loss upon not only humanity but here with the world's  Connoisseurs of hospitality- remember, we are their guests!


Please criticize in private,praise in public?  Doesn't it feel real good inside when someone takes time with you~ compliments you somehow? Ya betcha ...... Give it back sometimes! We all have feelings and no one should belittle another? I'm seeing more foreign people with disgusting attitudes here and it hurts everyone.
Not all of us are the same, and I'm not here to slam us foreigners ~ just perhaps a thought and observation of what might be when foolish pride is swallowed and open our eyes and hearts again? We are ambassadors and have somewhat of a duty in goodwill towards others. You have no idea what people are dealing with in their personal life.
So just be nice, it really is that simple.
❤️
Okay, just a short rant and clearing thoughts only?

Part 22~Calling to me

The clouds dance for me
The air sings
The waters massage me
The people warm my heart
Nature is my eye-porn!
I wasn't born here ~ I betcha I die here?

A very long time ago I left Southern California about 15 yrs old because it was stagnant and unprogressive and hitch hiked to San Francisco. High upon the mountain peak, I was lost, couldn't get my bearings of north- south- east or west? I felt good, my eyes were seeing new, exciting, different wonderful things! My mind was expanding and once that happens, it can't regain its former shape?

I was fortunate to be at the right spot- the right moment in time attending a free concert in the Panhandle of Golden Gate Park. I helped unload a huge flatbed truck for of musical gear. It turned out to be the Jefferson Airplane and was invited back to unload after concert. Right place and timing~ I'm not a super tech, just a bloke with integrity and completed tasks?

This was my introduction of shaping me into my becoming a road & stage manager (because I totally sucked as a drummer) and touring with the best bands history has known, leaving with Pink Floyd in 94. I am blessed!

So when I speak of 1994 visiting for the 1st time in the Philippines, it's almost quite the same type of sizzling energy. My eyes and senses coming back to life, what I see and experience is new, nothing dull and not the same ol' usual boring everyday stuff! We all have our own person reasons for why we are here and not back where we immigrated away from.

Why am I here? Probably the same reason perhaps any expat or visitor is, all we want is to be happy wherever we are? There is no place perfect, every paradise has a price and even a castle can feel like a prison! It's our inter self state of mind and attitude that can make us blissful or our worst enemy for certain.

My personal advice while here in the land of hearts aglow and smiles; keep your bad opinions to yourself, say thank you more often in the native dialect, smile and wave back, don't be a nosebleed,  be a joker here without disrespect, give high 5 without reaching for your sanitizer, walk and talk like an ambassador and campaign for this country's people!
Come on and let's losses up~ life a beach & this island is life!

Part ~21..... Earthbound Misfit~~~~~~~ I

No one is better than anyone else, & I pity those who think that they are. No matter how big your house is, how new your car is, or how much money sits in your bank account - our graves will be the same size.
Stay HUMBLE cause you don't know theirs or other people do not know your backstory.....

So just get over yourself and get that ego scotch guarded and dry cleaned?

Now, onward of why I chose the Philippines (or did it choose me?) 

I feel more relaxed, my senses on overdrive, I survive in Emerika, we thrive ~ I'm totally alive here and my 12 yr old son John echoes that also proudly in his heart as well! We are proud and blessed to be here in the land of smiles, hospitality, laughter, generosity, a helping hand when needed,great food and sooooo much more!

I suppose I'm attempting to write this after I overheard some expats commentary about what they don't like? I'm here to campaign ~ wish they would poof TNT? Why come into a host country as a guest, complain about this that and everything? Go back??? Nobody is forcing you "KARENS" to stay? Shut the F*** up and guitar pissing and taking a dump on their doorstep ❗❗❗

Why do I hold the Philippines, the country and people in such high regard, praise and passion? Does my money got further here than in Emerika ~ of course, but not as much as Thailand?

Let's compare California........... 🤔
A haircut here $.80,- $20 there
Smokes here $2,-there $11/15
Cab~Grab here $2/6,- there $30/80
Lodging ~ depends on your lifestyle
Food~ same thing
But, if you're not a big roller show off you can live like a rockstar CHEAP!

But remember same goes for us, we earn a dollar we spend a dollar. Filipino earns peso, spends peso? So if one is not lucky enough to own so rent is not paid while traveling that's a mess! For me I'm out of work for one and a half months with no income. Bills and utilities need to be paid and there is also property taxes insurance.

I also have my best friend and caring for my mother while I'm gone so I don't have to pay an extra $4,000 or $5,000for someone to care for her. Without this I wouldn't be here, I'd be stuck and so would my son.

I'm often asked why I don't have a girlfriend or remarry? Perhaps I'm a bit gun-shy---perhaps, if I do it would take away the experience of total evolvement I am able to feel of the love from everyone? But, I'm still open to the idea if it feels right and although far from desperate ~ I love being in love and being loved equally.

When times were good in the 80's I could earn $30k a week~ mid 2000's between $800-1,000 a day take home. Times have certainly changed and are much different now to say the least? My last swim up the stream is my construction supply company in Cebu. That's what I will leave behind along with the hilltop homestead in Busay.

I would also pray I leave behind my mark of good morals- integrity- fair judgment and honesty, humor and compassion and so forth for my boys. To be able in the matters of style, swim with the current; in matters of principle, stand like a rock!
Although I am troubled deeply about my eldest, I pray he shall awaken into the man he deserves to be. I have little worries about John my youngest on how he will meet life head on straight and held high. The only regret I have is that I'm not 40-50 yrs younger to have more time with them?

Part 20 ~Good Pacmanship

Of course it just not right to be here and not view the fight while here at the local gathering hole for refreshments at the sports bar at IT Park in Cebu. Only an hour before the fight just a handful of tables are taken in this 2 story complex of big screens throughout. Being just a tad early we can watch a few other fights before the main event.

One fighter is from here in Cebu and the folks here are fully aware of him and Ken translates the dialect from his conversations with his trainer. Pretty decent fighter I must admit and takes it to the 12th with a KO!
No too long those empty spaces are filled and even a crowd outside can see in to watch. There is surprisingly little or not traffic outside as it feels like a national holiday observed by al. John is getting his share of mango- coconut- banana- guava shakes, I'm not too aware as Ken and I are finishing our 1st bucket of Red Horse beers.

There are a few expats sitting away in a social group of about 10, I say hi and visit them briefly as I observe and listen. There are a couple of nice guys I think but the others are taking about life here and smack about this country, garbage- pollution- traffic- barriers of communication This, that and whatever? The cost of things? Really, ya got to be kidding me!

Okay, here's my thought; ya don't like it-then pack it up and leave? Want to help change it for betterment- cool!
Nobody is being forced to stay in a country known worldwide for their smiles, generosity,warmth,family values, self shame, medical facilities, and so on.....
Their grandiose delusional self absorbed blanket of pride is intrusively embarrassing not just to me but the culture as a whole! I remember Groucho Marx said: " I'd never belong to a group that would have me as a member " and that goes triple for me right here and now!

Making little haste I return to my boy and Ken, fights getting underway momentarily and I'm jacked up about now. Round #2 of a beer bucket and We are big eyed watching Paciou dance and play with his victim. I'm possibly getting so excited and maybe too loud cheering and well, I can't help it? There are others also so I'm in great company!

Not too far in his opponent takes a knee after getting spanked repeatedly? It's a pretty good match I'm thinking of the pairing but..... Wow! In the 7th, he takes another knee? Hummmmmmmm? No comment on this thought!
Well, PACMAN again is the superhero and pride of Philippines and I feel good again! Until the bill comes~ (joke)

S

Part 18

Part 4 (1)

Passports✔️anti mosquito venom✔️credit cards & cash✔️Imodium ✔️Tylonal ✔️sunglasses, shorts & smiles✔️

My son John & I are leaving a day earlier then departure  time, we can't have a flat tire or any mishaps? Breaking down on the mountain passes good luck getting any form of help where there's no cell signal or towns. There is no option to fail for us getting on our flight. Terry again has come to relieve us for our yearly escape to Philippines.

We are excited beyond belief and blessed to get a break from United States. Waiting, waiting, waiting for that call to board the plane, once seated there are no more worries for me or him. Now the boring part of stuck in the seat for 12 hours & transfers. But he's a trooper, a great companion and bestest friend- he knows well the rewards that await us!

About 18 hours later we land in Macton, Laupu-Laupu, Cebu and get our first smell of the hot sweet and sticky air ,mixed up with desiel, someone burning a pile of trash- plastic optional!  But that other seductive smell from far away gets attention from my big white nose, can ya smell that that surrounds you in a warm blanket of BBQ? My senses on overdrive-of course it's time to eat!!

Always there to greet us are Ken and Grace to accompany us for food and then deliver us through our condominium again. I have the desire to get some much needed and deserved rest, and I haven't slept since the day prior to departure from San Francisco and nothing on the plane as well. But like always I'm much too excited to be back home unlike my boy, can knockout any time -anywhere within three minutes and in a signal six don't be bothered or interrupted?  Sometimes this Boy of mine really can get on my nerves is I watch him snoring! Lol

OK, shower, pool, breakfast, money exchange, haircut, snack, got the morning covered already! I have some business to catch up on that I can't do over the telephone or computer from California. In the backseat of the car Grace navigates through traffic of metal like doing the tango. It's an art form that is rather leave to the professionals- Samar & Leyte no problem there but this is the 2nd largest city in Philippines like Edsa on steroids? We drive to a couple of projects, view some models and blueprint specs and meetings of our proposals and bidding with our construction supply company. It's not as easy as doing business back in California, here you kinda need to romance them not only with the best prices but lunch or dinner at a nice establishment as well as a gift sometimes!

All worn out we head up again into the mountains and hills of Busay (my happy place) and view the vast wonder of the city below at night time and have some drinks. Tonight is not much different from other times as Ken continues the search for property for me to buy. But, my being white, freckles, blue eyes and big nose the prices doubles so Ken negotiates saying it's the companies. Just like the wet market its customary to haggle, almost an insult  not to engage

John and I get restless and bored often waiting for our friend "Filipino time" so we run away and get lost on purpose. We grab a jeepney and tell them to take us to the end of the line as far as they go. We leave the city behind us and we climb and we climb around twists and turns through valleys and past multiple waterfalls down into canyons.

My kid is all but 12 and enjoying the ride but I'm grabbing him and poking him to look here- look there- look....... A squirrel????? I never tire of these majestic mountain ranges of virgin forests! I've tried asking about the virgins that live here but they don't seem to come down? It's almost like I am a child here of wonder and amazement here, yeah I'm half my age here in the Philippines and double back in America for sure!

John and I are stroll around the little town at a dead end. Way far out into the valleys and several waterfalls. We get some snacks and about three or four glasses of the most amazing fresh frozen coconut juice frozen mixed with the pulp,buy them out sadly? I could dive into a pool of this stuff and be most happy for a week!

Now, as a few hours have passed I ask the driver what time did he does his return and he answers that his tire is not roadworthy to make it to the city and return? So he gets to motorcycle drivers for a 45 minute ride back down the mountain into the city. The cost is four dollars each but I'll give them five.

We've been here week but I get it telephone call back at the condo from my younger, Filipino brother Benjie,  The reason why I 1st came to the Philippines and why I ended up staying. I've usually been alone in my travels here pretty much a month or so every year but this time you know, I'm not alone as my son John now age 12 is my shadow even at night time. My body or my bestest friend my younger self I can see of way back when......... Once upon a time.

I get a call from Benjie to come to Leyte~~~~~~~~

Chapter 17~

If you want to know where your heart is.... Follow where your mind wanders

So, let's get back to last year of 2017 and my first vacation time with my son old enough to get the grasp on being here and understanding and feeling what drives me back continuously instead of other countries that we could have gone to. This is more of course about observing his reaction and how adaptive and comfortable he is outside his normal comfort zone of California USA.

One of the very first things of course is to eat so Ken , Grace , John and I hit a well spread of buffet~ more like a mini- mall? Needless to say I'm all over everything not American. I came here for that stuff I can't get back in California! Lechon, Kare-kare, Adobo, sigsig,tapas, seashells, oh heck....... There's Japanese- Korean- Italian- ------- why not? 

I'm all over that and John experiments with a few samples and hesitations here and there. Some he really enjoys while others just crossed over the line, but I appluad  him for stepping up. There's some stuff there that looks like it's going to come up faster then it goes down!!!
After the dinner we check into the condo for the cityview and  get rid of the 16 hours of fatigue not counting stopovers and waiting for transfers. It seems jet lag never effects me coming here but certainly kicks my ass going back like I'm still stuck waiting to be here?

The morning finds us a bit more refreshed and John is excited about the rooftop pool. There from atop from this high-rise complex our eyes gaze over past the grand Waterfront Hotel up into the beautiful and stunning mountains of Busay and over into the island of Mactan, Laupu-Laupu were we landed a bit ago. His eyes are filled with amazement and wonder and I see my son (becoming me.)

I break up the business aspect and give more time to do more exploring and adventures while we are here. This is about his and our time together and again my observations of his reactions and thoughts of about living here permanently in the near future might be. I have someone given up on "Umerika". It's not what I once was proud of and admired and certainly not what I believe the world in the whole respects anymore? I'm not here to share my views or opinions for how the poster child for birth control became the president of the Divided States of America.

Being at the base of the mountains we shall take many a trips up here to the highest peak during daylight by the nights are spectacular by the dancing of the lights below. It looks like Las Vegas has arrived, And up here there is a breeze of fresh air, fog even? Birds and crickets chirping loudly in the night but of course no matter where we are~ time of day or night, there is the damn roosters having their karaoke sessions! This area is referred to as the "Beverly Hills"of Cebu and certainly with a price! This is where I plan to build and live, I may work in the city- but, I'm just really a country boy?

We do the usual things downtown of arcade, get out further for some water parks, horseback riding, wave boarding,  lots of island hoping indeed and yes~ swimming with the gentle giants, Whale Sharks in Oslob at the south end of the island.

Next day back in the city, access to a skyscraper gives us another view and thrill, riding the "Edge", a roller coaster type seat at 60° leaning over the edge of the building hanging from the  skyscraper around the perimeter. Then we complete the package by zip lining to the other skyscraper thousand feet away. Thrilling as it was-halfway back on the return, the joke was that I got stuck. Actually, my boy loves it so much we zip through canyons and valleys, over lakes to islands.

All too soon, always the time is not our friend and preparation are made for our departure in a few days. I/we worked hard for this one month of enjoyment and its 200% worth it always!

Chapter 16~A NEW Chapter called life

A new chapter called life
June 2017

Going through the motions in the struggles of every day life just to lay my head down to dream ~ to escape ~ to relive that the precious memories and moments past times and future goals of being back in the Philippines is my happy place in United States.

I've been asked to write again and while honored, I am very reluctant because I have no drive nor compassion or inspiration. I can only do this for a back when I am home. Now finally I am here again on vacation with my new guest- my son, John at 11 years old.

He has lived prior for 1 & 1/2 years in Leyte with his older brother and survived Yolanda because their mother and I separated. So I headed North to care for my mother who needed me in her later years.
( She passed away Oct 2019 before Covid-19 pandemic covering this planet). She was a great kind woman most called "their Den Mother" and I cared for her very well along at the end with her longtime friend  and roommate.  I definitely would not be able to care for her to the extent of what Terry's help and love offered!. She was not in critical/chronic pain and was happy to be crossing over to my Father and 2 older brothers.  I'd comb her hair, kiss her forehead,  hold her hand....ect.....doing the usual but Terry  and I knew it would be soon for her? Our last moments I was laying down on her bed for about a couple of hours...... until her very last breath and I held her for an hour after with her sweet spirit.


***back to~

Then, after the horrific Yolonda typhoon in 2013 I brought my 2 boys back to live with me. Unfortunately their mother tagged along- so thought I'd give it one last try taking one for the team to reconcile? But that didn't last very long and she was pregnant with another???? We divorced and both moved on, she has the eldest and her other child and I have my "bestest" buddy John, the youngest.

I've taking him now to Cebu where I have moved to and introduced him to my business partner Ken and his girlfriend Grace. Because of my past years being on the road and traveling with bands in with my mother called the "Peter Pan syndrome", I never married or had children till 45 years old. Some might recall maybe about the articles I had written prior before and published in Filipino magazines and newspapers ofwhere I had lived for 3 months every year of 1994-2000.

A simple native house of bamboo and coggon grass reeds on the roof with no neighbors on the beach overlooking the vast Pacific Ocean. Being there was no electricity where I lived, that meant no aircon- fan, fridge- TV- computer and no cell or telephone on the beach of Dolores Eastern Samar. This is where I call it "my being born Filippino " and totally immersing myself into the culture. That's why I always rode bus or ferry from Metro Manila when I got away from being stuck on plane! Everything was totally the opposite
being in the big city lifestyle of San Francisco California. How this could be done was 1 simple trick, my heart got infected by the warmth- the respect given toward others- the love & caring -the overwhelming generosity...... The world coniussers of hospitality! Eager to take time to chit-chat like bending your ear now?

Now settled into our 3rd day,  with the usual barrage of food being cooked for us (total overkill ~~~~please!) we somehow manage to get through breakfast? I'm continually out strolling and reexamining the beach from long ago, amazingly there are people that stop me and recognize me and even remember name~ even my family name! Ok, this has goosebumps and hair standing up all over me as I'm just flabbergasted & floored they would recall, sharp memory they have!

There is plenty of chitchat down memory lane of year when I was with my friends. My son knows I don't exaggerate or lie but now he gets to get an earful from the source of the past events when I was single. Big nose, blue eyes, freckles just blend in all too well well here.....LOL

A couple of days later we get to take a pump out to the nearby island briefly where I would visit before. Not too much time is spent roaming around because my companion is busy doing business. But my son can you have the expense now and visit of what I had spoken many time of as well. I'm so honored my son is able to visit do use places and see the faces and finally understand why it is that my heart got so deeply infected by country and people.

Back toward the evening time once again arriving at the resort a late lunch is laid out for although we didn't order food, but here it is? Sigsig, Lechon, eggs, pancakes, bananas & mangos! The folks that run this place are great, brother's Dante and Dex, sister Rizza, Uncle Peter and anty Jeneng and their sweet baby girl along with Jephanie the girlfriend of Dante. They are just fantastic making my son & I feel family, like long lost relatives, like a 5th cousin twice removed from my mother's brother's nephew's friends brother.... Something like that?